Key points

  • Property settlement is how separating couples divide property, debts and superannuation. Most people reach agreement without a court hearing.
  • Agreements can be made formal through consent orders or a financial agreement. Mediation is a common step if you can’t agree.
  • There are time limits for applying to the court, set out on the Federal Circuit and Family Court’s website. It’s worth checking the dates that apply to you with a lawyer or free legal service early.
  • Money is one of the most common causes of hostile messages after separation. Keep property messages short, factual and in writing.
  • FenceChat filters hostility out of your ex’s emails and texts, so negotiation messages stay about the numbers.

A friendly note: This guide shares general information to help you understand your options. It isn’t legal advice, and it can’t tell you what to do in your own situation. For that, a lawyer or a free legal service is the best next step, and you’ll find some in Where to get help.

What is a property settlement?

A property settlement is how a separating couple divides what they own and owe: the home, savings, cars, shares, businesses, debts and superannuation. It applies to married and de facto couples in Australia. Divorce is a separate process, and you don’t need to be divorced to settle your property.

There is no set formula. The Federal Circuit and Family Court explains that the court looks at what is fair in each case, including what each person contributed, financially and otherwise, and their future needs.

This guide is general information about the process and the communication around it, not legal advice. For your situation, a family lawyer or a free legal service is the best next step.

The property settlement process, step by step

  1. Gather the information. Each person usually shares details of assets, debts, income and super. Moneysmart’s divorce and separation financial checklist is a good starting point.
  2. Try to agree. Many couples negotiate directly or through lawyers.
  3. Mediation if you can’t agree. Property settlement mediation, or family dispute resolution, can help you reach an agreement without going to court. Mediation isn’t right for everyone, for example where there has been family violence, and a lawyer or free legal service can explain other options.
  4. Make it formal. Agreements are usually formalised through consent orders or a binding financial agreement. The court recommends legal advice before signing either.
  5. Court, as a last resort. If agreement isn’t possible, either person can apply to the court for financial orders.

Property settlement time limits

There are time limits for applying to the court for property orders. In general terms, the Federal Circuit and Family Court’s website explains them like this:

  • Married couples: within 12 months of the divorce becoming final.
  • De facto couples: within two years of the relationship ending.

Applying after a time limit has passed needs the court’s permission, which isn’t always given. Working out when your time limit starts isn’t always simple, so it’s worth checking your dates with a lawyer or a free legal service early, even if you hope to agree.

When the other person is delaying the property settlement

Delays are one of the most common frustrations. Information isn’t provided, emails go unanswered, or every proposal gets a new objection. A few things help:

  • Put requests in writing, with a date. “Could you please send your last three months of bank statements and your super statement by 15 November?”
  • Follow up once, calmly. “Following up on my email of 1 November. I still need the super statement to move forward. Please send it by the 15th.”
  • Keep a timeline of what you asked for, when, and what came back.
  • If delays continue, a lawyer or free legal service can explain the formal options, and check whether a time limit applies to you.

Keeping money messages calm during a property settlement

Money touches fairness, security and the past, so property messages can quickly turn into arguments about the whole relationship. These habits keep them on track:

  1. One topic per message, and keep property separate from parenting arrangements.
  2. Stick to figures, dates and documents. Leave out comments about spending, new partners or who was to blame.
  3. Don’t negotiate under pressure. “Thanks for the proposal. I’ll come back to you after I’ve had advice.” is a complete reply.
  4. Keep everything in writing and save it. A clear record helps your lawyer or mediator.

Our guides to the BIFF method and replying to an angry email have example wording. If children are involved, keep child support in its own conversation: see talking to your ex about child support.

How FenceChat helps: Property settlements bring out a lot of blame. FenceChat filters hostile, manipulative language out of your ex’s emails and texts before you read them and passes on the practical content: figures, documents, dates and proposals. They keep using email or text as normal, and every original message is kept in your Archive, and can be exported if your lawyer or mediator needs it. If your ex attaches documents to an email, such as bank statements or a valuation, they are passed on to you after a check for hidden code.

If you feel unsafe: Message habits and a filter are not a safety plan. If you are worried about your safety, contact one of the services below, or call emergency services if you are in danger.

Where to get help

These services are free or low-cost. If you or someone else is in danger, call your local emergency number first.

Australia

Free or low-cost legal help

Separation and co-parenting

Someone to talk to

  • Lifeline Crisis support and suicide prevention, any time. 13 11 14.
  • Beyond Blue Support for anxiety, stress and low mood. 1300 22 4636.

If you feel unsafe

  • Emergency: 000 Police, ambulance or fire, if you or someone else is in danger.
  • 1800RESPECT Free, confidential counselling for family, domestic and sexual violence, any time. 1800 737 732.

United States

Free or low-cost legal help

Separation and co-parenting

Someone to talk to

If you feel unsafe

United Kingdom

Free or low-cost legal help

Separation and co-parenting

Someone to talk to

  • Samaritans Someone to talk to, any time. Call 116 123.
  • Mind Mental health information and support.

If you feel unsafe

Frequently asked questions

What is a property settlement after separation?

It is how a separating couple divides property, debts and superannuation. In Australia it applies to married and de facto couples, and most people reach agreement without a court hearing.

Is there a time limit for property settlement after separation?

Yes. In general terms, the Federal Circuit and Family Court says married couples must apply within 12 months of their divorce becoming final, and de facto couples within two years of the relationship ending. Late applications need the court’s permission. This is general information, not legal advice, so check your own dates with a lawyer or free legal service.

What is the property settlement process?

Usually: gather financial information, try to agree, use mediation if you can’t, then formalise the agreement through consent orders or a financial agreement. Court is the last resort. This is general information, not legal advice.

What can I do if my ex is delaying the property settlement?

Put requests in writing with a clear date, follow up once calmly, keep a timeline, and ask a lawyer or free legal service about formal options, including whether a time limit applies to you.

How does FenceChat help during a property settlement?

FenceChat filters hostile language out of your ex’s emails and texts and passes on the figures, documents and proposals. Every original message is kept in your Archive and can be exported for your lawyer or mediator.